Remorse
by androgynous SAPIENS
Summary: Asami had taken many lives before, and none of his actions had any effect on the boy. But what if the lives taken were from the ones Takaba held dear the most? Not realizing the consequences awaiting ahead, Asami threw the boy away. Leaving Takaba to fell down alone in an enemy's grasp.


"Excuse me for interrupting, sire."

Asami raised his gaze, "Come in."

The secretary bowed his head once before coming in, an infuritated Takaba Akihito following closely behind. He walked past Kirishima straight to the man seated behind his desk. "Why?!", the boy yelled. "We had a deal! I've kept my ass out of your business, and the other way 'round you should!"

"Takaba-san!", Kirishima was ready to shrug the boy's hand off his boss' collar when Asami held up his. "It's okay, Kirishima. You're dismissed."

"B-but, sir?"

"I don't need to repeat. Now, OUT."

He gulped, though hesitating he nodded and went outside. Another guard staring at him as he closed the door, "Kirishima-san?"

Kirishima sighed, he shook his head then looked at the other anxiously. "I really have to go now," the secretary fixed his spectacles before he continued, "Just make sure nothing unwanted happen. I'm counting on you."

With a last smile, he headed to the elevator and went out of sight, leaving the other guard wondering. He was still looking at where the other had gone when a loud yell was heard.

"Answer me, Asami!"

"Takaba, you need to calm—"

"Calm down?! How the hell am I supposed to? You just killed them, Asami! YOU-KILLED-THEM!", the boy finally dropped down, hyperventilating. A drop of tear threatening to fall down, but he didn't do anything to hide it. He sobbed once, looking at the older man with despise. "I can't believe this..."

Asami was silent all the time, waiting for his boy's anger to subside first. Till then, he decided to keep his mouth shut. Takaba continued to sob while wiping his tears away, his right hand was still grasping the collar of Asami's shirt, though the grip had loosened long since. Asami looked at him, he circled his arms around the boy's torso and held Takaba close. "You have to let me explain, Akihito."

This time Takaba didn't do anything to cut off, he just closed his eyes tight and wept on the older man's broad chest. Asami had pulled him up to sit on his lap and turned the chair so that it was now facing the window behind them. "Look out there," he pointed.

Takaba lifted his head and turned slightly around to see what the other wanted to show him. "Tell me," Asami spoke, he caressed Takaba's cheek and whispered close to him. "What do you see?"

The boy, still hiccuping, focused on the view in front of his eyes. What was it that the older man expect him to see? "Tokyo?"

"Exactly."

Takaba was the quiet one now. He didn't understand. "What do you mean?"

Asami wasn't looking at him, his gaze was directed at the night life dwelling in the city below. "I rule Tokyo, Akihito. I do,"

"...and the same goes to you."

At those words, Takaba snapped. He jumped off Asami's lap and started yelling again, "No!"

"YES, I do. And I will do anything I could to protect you."

"Protect me? How does killing my colleagues be equalized as protecting? What you did-WAS-a crime!"

"You don't understand, they were trying to harm you."

"BUT YOU DIDN'T HAVE TO TAKE THEIR LIVES, ASAMI!"

The next second was wrapped in silence, Takaba had a boiling rage filling his mind, all he wanted to do was to blame the older man for the deaths of his friends. He backed down until his shoulder hit the glass window. A hand was brought up to his face, muffling his desperate cries.

Asami kept his cool appearance, even if inside he was growing mad. Takaba just couldn't understand, all he did was purely because his concern for the boy. He didn't even notice that those rotten colleagues of his had been probing him for a long time.

"What choice did I have?"

Takaba sobbed and inhaled a bunch of air into his lungs. "You could've handed them to the police and—"

"—and let them bribe the constabulary to set them on the loose again?"

Takaba was startled by the answer, he thought of the fact that Asami had knocked into his mind. And to his discomfort, it was true. "But they are...", he stared at the older man with disgust. "For GOD's sake! They are my buddies!"

"That doesn't change the fact that they tried to harm you."

"And that fucking '_fact'_ also does not change the fact that you killed them!"

"Be rational, AKIHITO! Kou and Takato were undercover agents."

"They were threatened to be because that damn rival of yours wants to crush you!"

"By approaching YOU! That's why I have to exterminate them, Akihito."

"Then that means this would never happen if YOU never kidnapped me, raped me, and forced me to stay by your side! Since the day you took me in, all and every eyes of your enemies are directed toward me!"

Asami gritted his teeth, his patience was getting thinner. He knew one day something like this would happen. Being a lover of a yakuza is not an easy matter, plus, Takaba wasn't born as a child of his world. He knew the boy needed to learn how survive in this world first, but teaching him was something that he hated to do, because every lesson must inflict pain to the boy-both physically and mentally. He worries all the time that one day the boy would finally give up and leave.

Takaba was surrounded in the haze of anger when he stated the last time. He fully understood that what he had said lit up Asami's rage, since his last statement was actually the same as him telling the other that he regretted their union. If someone asked, the truth is, he had never and will never regret it. He loves the other, though being too scared that the feelings never returned that he never said it.

Asami had come to the point where he could explode at any time, but for the boy's well being, he held back. Instead of pulling his gun out and shooting mercilessly on the glass next to Takaba's head, he chose to use his usual method to calm both sides.

He stood up and walked slowly to Takaba, wrapping his arms around him. He trapped the boy between the window and his towering figure. Not caring for the rejection he got, he crushed their lips to hush the boy. Molding their tongues in a long, sensuous moves. He caressed Takaba's side, earning a gasp from the swollen lips.

"Asami..."

"Ssh... Don't speak."

Asami trailed small kisses on the side of his neck, one hand descended further down to fist on the boy's groin. He massaged the growing bulge gently while his mouth devoured Takaba's in an insatiable hunger. He undid the button on the boy's trousers to take it off, but he stopped suddenly.

He heard it. The boy was crying, again, in the most saddening way he ever heard.

"Akihito?"

He looked down to see the boy, Takaba was holding his suit and crying miserably on his shirt. Asami was left bewildered, he didn't know what shall he do. Seeing Takaba's cries is one of the few things that could tore his cool composure away. He hugged the boy, giving him warmth and comfort-that was the best he could do to soothe him.

"Akihito... Ssh. Everything is okay now."

Asami felt the grip on his suit tightened, he was about to shush the boy again when a pair of hands pushed him back.

"How could you say that? Nothing is okay," the boy muttered.

Asami sighed. He stared at the boy's swollen eyes. "I'm sorry about everything," the man said. " But I did what I must."

Takaba snorted, "I want them back."

Asami's eyes formed to slits instantly. "Akihito. Stop this nonsense. How many more times do I have to knock some senses into your mind? They are dead."

"You killed them."

Damn. This was getting nowhere.

Asami combed his hair with his fingers, trying to build some more patience inside. "I did."

"Though you apologized doesn't mean you've changed anything."

"What do you expect of me, Akihito?"

The boy didn't mutter a word at first, but then, he said, "I hate you."

The man froze. That three words he heard wasn't the same as the usual 'I hate you' Takaba would mutter playfully. This one was serious, and it struck him like lightning. He felt really angry right now. "You just really can not appreciate what I did to save you, can you?"

Takaba shivered when he heard the coldness of the tone.

"I need answer, Takaba Akihito."

The boy was muted, he couldn't think a word.

"Then you may leave."

Takaba stared at the man wide eyed. He saw Asami walking back to his chair and continued to work on his papers like he did before the boy appeared. He was still contemplating what he had heard. The man said he may leave. Was that all?

"Asami?"

He didn't answer.

"Asami..."

"I said LEAVE."

Takaba jolted.

"Why...?"

Without even looking at him, Asami answered with a flat tone, as if nothing had happened. Ever. "I don't need you anymore," the man turned his chair to him, "You put no respect on what I did for you. I don't need that."

"B-but, after all this? What do I do?"

Asami chuckled smugly, "After all what, Akihito? I don't care what you're going to do from now on. I've grown tired of you. Now, go."

Those words were the last ones he heard from Asami's mouth. As he ran through the door, they kept replaying over and over in his mind. He knew from that moment on that everything was over. '_Them' _was already over. The other man had finally dumped him, and he still couldn't set his pride aside to plead the man to accept him back.

He started to sob again, but no tear spilled down. He had cried too much that his eyes felt dry. This day was going to be noted forever in his memory. The day when The Great Asami Ryuichi tossed him aside.

Agonizing.

The guard outside Asami's office saw the boy ran away, and he knew why. He heard most of the conversation inside. And as Kirishima-san had expected, this was not going to be a good omen. At any rate.

* * *

Asami was not checking on the workpapers on his desk, he was staring at the window behind his seat. His bangs were ruffled and uncombed, cigarette in one hand and a tumbler filled with alcohol in the other one. He mused everything that was just recently happening.

What have I done?

* * *

**A/N: Thank you for reading this first chapter. If you find any grammatical errors or misspellings, please feel free to correct my mistakes in the review. I'm also waiting for your comment and reviews, so please leave at least one. I'm still working on the next chapter, and I'm also still in the process to rewrite my other story; The Edge of a Downfall.**

**Sincerely, androgynous SAPIENS.**


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